


Support

by Marrilyn



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Caring, Caring Rowena, Conversations, Episode: s13e21 Beat the Devil, F/F, Girls Kissing, Helpful Rowena MacLeod, Holding Hands, Hugs, Minor Injuries, Supportive reader, Talking, Tears, Worry, worried Rowena
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-13
Updated: 2018-05-13
Packaged: 2019-05-06 08:48:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14638323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marrilyn/pseuds/Marrilyn
Summary: Reader supports Rowena, no matter what.





	Support

I had all happened in a blur. One moment Rowena was in Lucifer's face, twisting the knife the same way he had done to her. The next, he was squeezing her neck so hard you thought he would crush her throat between his fingers. You tried to intervene, but one flick of his free hand, and you were thrown back. As if you were as light as a feather, weightless, your body slammed into the opposite wall and fell down with a loud thump. Your head crashed into the floor and you let out a yelp.

Sharp pain pierced your skull, from the injured spot in your forehead down to the bone, and spreading through your head like wildfire. You wanted to scream, but the only sound leaving your mouth were light wheezes of your fastening breaths.

You looked up, and panic settled in your eyes at the sight of Rowena struggling to breathe in the devil's deadly grip. Her eyes met yours for a split second, and a small relief glinted in them at the confirmation that you were okay — as okay as you could be, given the predicament. Lucifer ranted on; you couldn't make out all the words he was saying, the ringing in your ears obstructing your hearing. But the threat in his tone was clear — he wanted to kill Rowena. Again.

Pouring all your strength into your arms, you raised yourself up. You scrambled to your feet and leaned against the wall for support. Your legs were wobbly, trembling, as if your bones had turned to jelly. You scoured your mind for a spell — _any spell_ — that could get Lucifer off your girlfriend, which proved to be a challenge for your dizzy mind. _Think!_ you urged yourself. There were spells that could help — there had to be! And if your mind wasn't in a haze and words weren't swirling around it in an incoherent hurricane, you would have already cast one. You would have protected your girl, something you'd promised to do every time a nightmare haunted her dreams or a random flashback snuck up on her during the day.

When the time came to make good on that promise, you could only stare and do nothing. Say nothing. _Think_ nothing. Some girlfriend you were.

Luckily, Rowena was a much quicker thinker than you were. Despite the tight hold on her throat, she spat out a defensive spell. Lucifer instantly released her. He flew back, the same way you had only moments earlier.

And fell straight into the rift.

Rowena collapsed on the floor, her legs giving in, hungrily breathing in the air that had been denied to her. Then her eyes fell on the rift and widened as shock and panic downed on her face like a slap, the realization of what had just happened sinking in.

"Bollocks."

"Rowena!" you called, prompting her to avert her eyes to you. You rushed to her side, Lucifer and the rift forgotten. The only thing that mattered was her. Everything else could wait. "Are you okay?"

"Aye," she replied.

The look in her eyes told you she was anything but.

Had the literal personification of your worst nightmares tried to squeeze the life out of you, after he had already murdered you two times in the past, you wouldn't be okay, either.

You offered both hands to Rowena and she gratefully took them. As soon as she was on her feet, you pulled her to you, locking her in a tight embrace. _You're safe,_ you thought. Tears gathered in your eyes, blurring your vision. A few rolled down your cheeks, flushing them redder, hotter, and dropped into her hair. _You're safe. You're here. You're safe._

When Lucifer had first grabbed her, you thought that was it — you were going to lose her again. And she would come back more broken than she'd ever been, and this time you wouldn't be able to do anything to fix it. To fix _her._ Your hugs wouldn't be able to calm down her nightmares and flashbacks anymore. Your words wouldn't be able to break her out into the light from the depths of darkness she'd find herself in.

A whimper escaped you as images of her burnt body swirled around your mind like a tornado, swallowing all coherent thoughts you had left. Your hold on her tightened; you needed to sense her, feel her, needed to make yourself believe that she was real and unharmed.

"It's alright, darling," Rowena said softly. She returned the hug, her hands rubbing comforting circles up and down your back.

"I thought-I thought he…" _I thought he'd kill you again._ A sob cut you off before you could finish the sentence. Your stomach churned as the smell of burning flesh filled your nostrils. The smell of that day. The smell that would haunt you for the rest of your life.

You couldn't go through that again.

 _Rowena_ couldn't go through that again.

"He didn't," she said. "I'm fine." She stepped back from the hug and cupped your tear-drenched cheeks. Her expression was that of sympathy, features soft, delicate, loving. "Breathe, darling."

"He hurt you," you said, clasping your hands over hers.

"I'm _fine,"_ she repeated. Then her eyes settled on your forehead. "But you're not."

"It's nothing." It was just a minor injury. Compared to the trauma she'd endured, it was nothing.

"It's not nothing, Y/N. You're bleeding!" Rowena said in her mom tone, and had the situation been different, you would have chuckled. Everyone who thought her heartless should see her when she was caring. There was no one you trusted more with your vulnerabilities than her. "Come here."

She sat you down on the chair she'd occupied earlier. She fetched a wetted cloth and started dabbing at the injury, wiping away the blood that had already started to crust. She was careful, each press of the cloth against your skin gentle and soft. Warmth churned in your heart at every touch. It was hard to believe that this woman — this sweet, tender, caring woman — used to be a wicked witch who cared for nobody but herself. That she used to say that she did not, would not, and had not loved anything ever. That she had agreed with Amara that she'd had no capacity for kindness.

Even back then, you loved her exactly the way she was. Getting to know the real her, the loving woman behind the mask of heartlessness, had made you love her even more.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you," you said.

"That's not your job," Rowena said.

"I promised I would."

"And I know you would have if you could." Having cleaned your wound, she set the pink-tinted cloth aside and looked you in the eyes. "You were there for me. That's more than I could ever ask."

A small smile broke on your mouth. You reached for her hand and took it in your own, squeezing it the same way you had moments earlier when Lucifer's words brought her back to that hotel room of horrors. Brought her back to the brutality and trauma of her death. Your stomach turned with disgust and unease as he reminisced, his voice as rotten as his soul. Rowena's earlier warning to pay him no mind was the only thing stopping you from lunging at him like a rabid beast and tearing him apart limb by limb.

"I'll always be there," you promised, with every intention of keeping it.

Rowena returned your smile. "I know, darling. I'm one lucky witch."

"I could say the same thing." Your free hand brushed against her cheek, then slid lower, down to her neck. Your fingers traced the redness sprawled across her skin, remnants of Lucifer's cruelty. "Does it hurt?"

"A bit," Rowena said honestly. Your heart ached for her. She didn't deserve to be in pain. After everything he'd done, that monster had no right to put his hands on her. "The bloody bastard's strong. But don't worry, dear," she added, seeing the concern on your face. "It's not as bad as it looks."

She emphasized her words by pressing a kiss to your hand.

Experience had taught you that Rowena's wounds were always — without exception — as bad as they looked — if not worse. But instead of arguing her further, you nodded in acknowledgment of her words and tightened your grin on her hand. The poor woman had been traumatized enough for one day. You fussing over her neck would only bring everything back. As she often said when you would get in one of your overprotective modes, she wasn't made out of glass. A few days, and the bruises would fade as if they were never there.

"What now?" you asked, looking around the library, eyes skimming the room before settling back on her.

A look of uncertainty splashed over Rowena's face. She was silent for a moment, then, letting out a sigh, said, "We leave."

The answer left you dumbstruck. "What?"

"Sam and Dean are trapped in some sort of nightmare universe with the devil himself, all thanks to me."

"That's not your fault." It kind of was, but you could hardly blame her for being upset at Lucifer. The bastard had triggered her for no reason other than to hurt her. That would make anyone upset.

"It is," she insisted.

"Rowena…"

"This isn't how I wanted things to work out, but… There's no other choice."

She sounded more like she was trying to convince herself than you.

"You sure?" you asked.

"Aye."

An obvious lie.

"There's nothing you can do?"

Rowena took a deep breath. "I might be able to devise a way to keep the door back home open for them. Emphasis on _might._ There is no guarantee that it would work. And even if it did…" She looked at you with eyes full of unshed tears, as wounded as those of a puppy. "What would they say when they found out I set Lucifer free?"

"They'd be grateful," you told her. They fucking better be grateful. They left her with a person who had traumatized her for life. Did they think he was going to be quiet? Sam, of all people, should have known something like this would happen.

"Or they'd put a witch-killing bullet in my head," Rowena said.

"They would have to put one in mine first," you said. "But that's not gonna happen." You weren't the Winchesters' biggest fan, but, just like Rowena, they had changed. They weren't the same anti monster people they used to be.

"You don't know that."

"Not one hundred percent, no," you agreed. "I just know they've changed. Like you. I still don't fully trust them, but I know they wouldn't hurt you on purpose." Not anymore. Those days were long behind you. "But if you want to leave, then let's go."

She frowned. "Really?"

"Yeah," you said with a nod. "Sam and Dean are okay — for hunters — but we don't owe them anything. Hell, I'm only here 'cause you wanted to help them. If you still wanna help them, that's fine. If not, that's fine, too." You took her other hand into yours with a tight grip. "No matter what you decide, I support you."

Rowena looked like she wanted to cry. She stared at you, lower lip quivering as she tried her hardest to keep her tears at bay. "Bloody sap," she said teasingly.

You chuckled. "You know it, honey."

"I hate you."

"Likewise."

She let out a small laugh. "You're insufferable."

"Takes one to know one, babe," you retorted playfully. "So what's it gonna be? We going home or staying?"

Rowena's expression grew serious. She pondered on it for a moment, then her features twisted with determination you hadn't seen on her face in weeks. "We're staying."

"You're sure?" you asked. The last thing you wanted was for her to feel pressured.

She nodded. "I don't know if I'll be able to accomplish anything, but I will try."

"I'll help you," you said.

"Thank you, dear."

Standing up, you pressed your lips to hers in a kiss. Electricity surged through you as soon as her skin touched yours. Even years since the first time you'd kissed her, her lips tasted the same; same sweetness, same energy, same fire. No matter how much time had passed, Rowena MacLeod never lost her flavor — and she never would.

"I'm really proud of you," you said as your lips parted, shooting her a bright smile.

Rowena's cheeks flushed deep red. "It's been a while since I've heard that one."

"In that case, you'll be hearing it every single day from now on."

"Flatterer."

"Just being honest, sweetheart." You pulled her in for another kiss and then, motioning towards the rift, said, "Now, how do we do this thing?"

"I think I know where to start," Rowena said, already flipping through the spellbook.

"Lead the way."

**Author's Note:**

> Edited by my wonderful friend OswinTheStrange.
> 
> I will be honest. I am not happy with this fanfic at all. I hope you guys like it because, personally, I find it to be one of my worst ones. I lost inspiration less than halfway through it.


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